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29 May 2024

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Why Don’t We Talk About Infertility?

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Virtus Health

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The joy of pregnancy is much revered. After all, it symbolises new life, and for most people, new beginnings. Pregnancy and infertility may seem to be on opposite ends of the spectrum, but guess what? They have a lot more in common than you think.

Think emotional rollercoasters, hope and uncertainty, changes in lifestyle, and more. But since they both represent parts of the reproductive journey, why is infertility not talked about enough?

Feelings of shame and inadequacy

Does experiencing infertility mean we are automatically labelled as a failure in society? Of course, not – but that might be what some people may feel. After all, a family is usually defined as a group of one or more parents living together with their children. Hence, it is easy to associate failure with themselves when couples experience infertility and are unable to form their supposed dream family.

Long periods of infertility may also cause one to feel shame, or inadequate, even. This feeling can sometimes be amplified when surrounded by family and friends who have started their own families and moved on to the next phase in life.

But remember, everyone’s journey is different. If you have been trying for some time now and are not seeing results, speak to a gynaecologist as soon as you can – learn about how you can take charge of your fertility health and work towards your goals. Shying away from the topic and being avoidant are not going to help.

Even though women are genetically made to conceive, being infertile does not make you less of a woman. It might be difficult to come to terms with the fact that you are experiencing infertility issues now but please know that this is not a death sentence.

Afraid of the inappropriate things people say

Truth to be told, there are too many people who do not know what to say in difficult situations – even those who genuinely care and are compassionate.

Even if you are talking to someone who has experienced a similar situation, they may not know the right things to say too. Most people might squirm when the topic arises or attempt to offer comfort in the best way possible.

Just know that infertility is not the only situation where people make inappropriate remarks. It applies in situations like divorce, death, or even a terminal diagnosis – but people do not mean malice.

Keep the infertility conversation alive

Remember, by raising awareness and sparking more conversations, we can help individuals and couples feel less isolated, encourage them to seek help, and ensure they get the appropriate treatments.

Take the time to research your condition and consult with experienced fertility specialists. Learn about the assessment and treatment options available, and what you can do to reach your fertility health goals.


Ready to begin your fertility journey? Learn how our fertility specialists can assist you. Call us at +65 6460 4555 or click here to book an appointment.

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